| Author | Message | ||
| Gary Blankenship
Senior Member Username: garyb Post Number: 5377 Registered: 07-2001 |
An Incessant Downpour I would sleep through the night, enjoying my nightmares and daydreams, if she did not badger me with questions: who are you where are you what do you eat wear do what do you want why are you there where will your journey take you who did you kiss Who should be asking why? Who should be the one disturbing the other? Who痴 dreams should fail to hold back the chatter? And yet, out of respect for the matriarch, I might attempt answers I知 the north wind and last star in the east. I知 at the bottom of a well. I eat toads and chocolate marshmallows. I wear a purple tux, pink cummerbund and heels. I dream nightmares when I知 not disturbed. I want power, success and a good cup of cheese soup. There? Where? Some questions defy an answer. I will finish my excursion among primroses and yellow parrots. I kiss the back of the queen痴 hand, careful to not offend the king. The asker should be pure of heart and quick of hand. The disturber should yield a mean rapier. The chatter so like cobblestones, I wonder if the Ripper knew these fantasies. The questions answered the answers do not seem all that special, or least enough to disturb my nightmares and send my dreams a packing. Perhaps to one as lonely as she, perhaps royalty needs definition where none is possible. Or perhaps my nightmare was mine and her voice was never heard, only rain on the roof and jays in the cedars. The Eye of the Coming Storm http://www.mindfirerenew.com/ | ||
| Zephyr
Senior Member Username: zephyr Post Number: 2982 Registered: 07-2003 |
Reading this I realise I probably did this workshop exercise wrong,will have to get some practise in like you!  I think cedars appear in your poems as often as cats! | ||
| Christopher T George
Senior Member Username: chrisgeorge Post Number: 2747 Registered: 12-2004 |
Hi Gary Strong piece, Gary. Enjoyed! Chris Editor, Desert Moon Review http://www.desertmoonreview.com/ Co-Editor, Loch Raven Review http://www.lochravenreview.com/ http://chrisgeorge.netpublish.net/ | ||
| Gary Blankenship
Senior Member Username: garyb Post Number: 5392 Registered: 07-2001 |
Z, as I said, no right or wrong. I live among cedars, the major tree here, a large part of the homestead's magic. Thanks, friends, for the read. Gary The Eye of the Coming Storm http://www.mindfirerenew.com/ | ||
| ~M~
Board Administrator Username: mjm Post Number: 5623 Registered: 11-1998 |
Hell of a lot of questions from this old matriarch, Mr. B. I'd tell her to go to hell, if I were you.  Oddly enough, I think this is one of your best pieces. Not that your other work is substandard, but it was very interesting to hear from the poet. Especially here: "I知 the north wind and last star in the east. I知 at the bottom of a well. I eat toads and chocolate marshmallows. I wear a purple tux, pink cummerbund and heels. I dream nightmares when I知 not disturbed. I want power, success and a good cup of cheese soup. There? Where? Some questions defy an answer. I will finish my excursion among primroses and yellow parrots. I kiss the back of the queen痴 hand, careful to not offend the king." Good answers! | ||
| Gary Blankenship
Senior Member Username: garyb Post Number: 5399 Registered: 07-2001 |
M, I loved doing that section. Of turning loose. There might be a poem in each of these lines. Hmmmm. Thinking on that. Smiles and thanks. Gary The Eye of the Coming Storm http://www.mindfirerenew.com/ | ||
| Laurie Byro
Advanced Member Username: lauriette Post Number: 1333 Registered: 11-2003 |
missed this and glad it got an HM so I got to look at it, strong poem, thanks Mr. B Mrs B | ||
| Gary Blankenship
Senior Member Username: garyb Post Number: 5502 Registered: 07-2001 |
Thanks much, friend. Gary The Eye of the Coming Storm http://www.mindfirerenew.com/ |
